"It's So Hard to Love You: Staying Sane When Your Loved One is Manipulative, Needy, Dishonest, or Addicted" by Klatte, Bill and Thompson, Kate New Harbinger: 2007
I checked this book out of the library because I am having difficulty with boundary issues with someone in my life and wanted to read a book before purchasing it. I had gone into the catalog of the public library and chose it from the description and it is easily what I need. It is full of advice but in small manageable sections. There are lots of examples of people so that the reader can easily identify.
For me, I am having pain just reading about the information so appreciate the fact that I don't have to read cover to cover but can skip to the appropriate sections that I need addressed. For example, the authors described different terms such as enmeshed which I believe I fall into and then examples of people who are and possible antidotes for such behavior. They also go into definitions of those who do too little and too much in this area.
The authors have the opinion that those who read this book still want to help their loved ones, but they don't want to enable them or make them worse. They are not advocating a complete break but ways of helping our loved ones with problems in such a way that they have a better way of getting help than simply everyone falling out of the boat and drowning. The sub-tittle is staying sane and this is the book to help the reader do just that.
Both authors are very knowledgeable and provide expert information on dealing with the people who have addictive and similar problems because when you are caught in their situations you have it too to some degree. The bottom line is tough love though but in a way that gives the loved one a chance on escaping his or her problem and not sink you in the process.
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